Noticing changes in a loved one can be worrying, but it is important to talk to them about your concerns before they become a real problem. A person who is struggling may initially be reluctant to accept that they might need care, perhaps due to embarrassment or fear of losing their independence. However, there are often signs that suggest a person would benefit from more support, whether from a family member or professionals.
In this blog, we’ll take a look at the signs that your loved one might need extra help, when you should consider a care home and how to broach this difficult conversation with them.
Signs Your Loved One Might Need Care
Increased Reliance on Others. Families might notice that their loved one is calling more often or looking for reassurance as they begin to trust themselves less.
Falls Becoming Frequent. Falling over can be an obvious sign that your loved one's mobility is declining, and that their home is no longer suitable or safe for them to navigate.
Becoming Withdrawn. People who are normally sociable may avoid leaving their home due to mobility problems or worries about forgetfulness. Losing interest in seeing friends or taking part in hobbies can be a sign of low mood or depression. Similarly, changes in routine such as sleeping more or eating less can be easier to spot.
Mood or Behaviour Changes. Those who would benefit from everyday help may become frustrated or irritable more regularly from trying to cope on their own. Uncharacteristic changes in behaviour or anxiety can also be early warning signs of dementia.
Loss of Confidence. When someone notices changes in themselves, it can be distressing. They may stop attempting certain tasks around the house due to fear of not being able to complete them, falling over or forgetting something.
Forgetfulness or Confusion. You might notice that an elderly relative is forgetting appointments, frequently has trouble finding the right words, or asks repeated questions during a conversation. Some forgetfulness is normal as we age, but repeated and worsening confusion can be a sign of mild cognitive impairment or dementia.
They Seem Lonely. Isolation and loneliness can have serious adverse effects on older people’s physical health, putting them at risk of depression or heart problems. Those living alone are much more at risk, especially if leaving the house is becoming more difficult for them.
They Are Neglecting Their Self-Care. You may notice that someone’s appearance has changed, that they have noticeable body odour or that their home is unclean or untidy when you visit. This could suggest that they are struggling to maintain their personal care and household due to cognitive or physical changes. Equally, you may notice that they have lost weight or aren’t cooking as much, which can cause concern, especially over time.
At What Point Should Someone Go Into A Care Home?
There is no “right time” for a person to move into a care home. It depends on many factors such as their physical health, mental wellbeing and the family support available.
If a person is already being cared for by a loved one, they may move into a care home if their needs become too challenging for them to manage at home. Their carer may experience burnout or become ill themselves, resulting in the need for additional support. Some health issues may also require continuous nursing care, around the clock.
Having an open conversation with your loved one about their care options is the best first step. Keep the chat relaxed and positive, focusing on how a care home can benefit your loved one, rather than what they can no longer do.
A care home may become the only option if your loved one has a fall or is struggling to keep themselves safe. It is always better to take preventative measures and move into a care home before an accident happens or a crisis point is reached. This will allow you to take the time to choose the ideal care home with your loved one, rather than rushing into a decision.
Overall, someone should move into a care home if they believe their wellbeing would be improved by the professional round-the-clock support, social lifestyle and reassurance provided.
Getting a Care Needs Assessment
Once you have spoken to your loved one about how they are feeling, the next step is to get a Care Needs Assessment. This is a free assessment you can request from your council’s social care department. You can contact them on behalf of your loved one or they can do it themselves.
During the assessment, your loved one will be asked questions about what they are struggling to do, their goals, care needs and how suitable their home is. This information will be used to create a care plan that sets out how they believe your loved one's needs will be best met. Based on this, the council can offer support or recommend a course of action.
Who Decides if an Elderly Person Goes Into a Care Home?
In most cases, the individual must choose for themselves whether they want to move into a care home.
A family member cannot automatically make this decision on someone else’s behalf. If the person lacks the mental capacity to make the specific decision, the appropriate decision-making process must be followed.
Therefore, it is vital to have a sensitive and honest conversation, guided by your loved one’s wishes.
Broaching the Conversation Around Care
Talking about care with your loved one will not always be easy, so make sure to approach the discussion with empathy.
Stay non-confrontational and try not to make accusatory statements about the changes you’ve noticed. This could cause your loved one to become defensive or upset.
Remind your loved one that you have their best interests at heart, and that any issues they are experiencing can be managed with the right attention.
Involve other loved ones, but make sure they don’t feel ambushed. Choose a calm moment and minimise distractions.
Have the discussion sooner rather than later. Early intervention can mean less stress, and getting the right help sooner can even help slow cognitive decline.
Promoting Independence and Wellbeing at Colinton Care Home
Here at Colinton Care Home, our compassionate team is here to support you and your family through the entire process with professional advice and expert care. We would love to invite you to take a relaxed, no-obligation tour of our care home in Edinburgh, where you can discover how our holistic approach promotes independence and wellbeing. Please arrange a home visit today to see what makes Colinton Care Home so special.
